Monday - the week can only get better

I had one of those days. You know the ones: everything you touch breaks, every conversation is difficult and nothing works out like you planned.

I won't bore you with the whiny details but it started with a visit to the school guidance counselor and ended when the handle on my toilet tank broke - and I only have one bathroom.

On a brighter note I did manage to figure out my hero's internal GMC  which  leads to the reason my hero and heroine can't be together and feeds into the black moment.

You may have noticed my exercise ticker on the right only made it to the 3 hrs when the goals was 6 hrs for the previous two weeks. Not a smashing success considering how much eating I've done over the past couple of weeks. However, I'm back on track. The junk food is out of the house. And I went to the gym this afternoon.  So, I'll be changing the ticker tomorrow ( because I'm too tired and sore to do it this evening.)


Hoping to make a real dent in the word count this week.

Rejection

I received a rejection from Desire on my full, An Unsuitable Mistress.  Shana Smith, editorial assistant had this to say:

Aspects of this story are compelling, particularly your writing, but the characters' conflicts are a bit muddled and episodic, and Nicco's intentions concerning Lisa become unclear..

She goes on to explain a little further and then ends with:

If you have a project suitable for Silhouette Desire in the future, please free to query me again.

The revisions suggested by the previous editor asked that I take out one of the external plot points, which was the big reason for Nicco's actions. I struggled in the rewrite with replacing that motivation. Looks like I didn't quite succeed. I also have a tendency to throw too much external plot into my books which I think leads to the episodic issue. When I can't think of  "what next" I throw in a twist or surprise. And sometimes it really isn't the logical next step. Logical Next Steps are a term I learned from an online workshop with Susan Meier


I sent the full in on Oct 13 so this response was much quicker than any other submission. But it's ironic that one of the reasons for the rejection was the hero's motivation and that's what I'm struggling with in my current story.

So for now, I'll concentrate on the new book, Executive Demands for the Desire Pitch. But I love Lisa and Nicco and plan to make him a little more alpha, the story a little darker and eventually send it to Presents.

Next Desire Pitch

Rae, one of the hosts at eharlequin just posted in the Desire thread that the next pitch for Desire will be March 19. Details will be posted soon.

Oh lord, how many weeks is that? Seven weeks and three days?

Can I write 35,000 readable words in that time frame? I had planned to have this MS completed by the end of Feb. But best laid plans..and all that..

Still need a reason for my Hero's behavior. At the moment he is wondering around doing things but no one knows why. What motivates him? Money, success, acceptance? And why does he reject the heroine? Because everyone else in the book can see they were made for each other.

Jennifer Lewis, my critique partner, sold as a result of a pitch about two years ago. The Desert Prince, her latest, is available in Feb. Pick it up. You'll love it!

Step Back

Took a step back from the WIP this weekend.  Printed out the first 60 pgs and reread, reorganized the order of scenes and delved into my Hero's internal and external goals. I often have a lot of external events but scrimp on the emotional and internal reactions of my characters. Sometimes this is because I "see" what they do but I can't "see" into their mind to figure out why. As I write the book, reread and revise,  who my characters are on a deeper level is revealed to me.

I knew my heroine from the opening scene. Not so much the Hero. He's finally let me into his head - just a little bit.  Maybe he's more difficult to know because he's a more closed off character?  He doesn't know why he does what he does.  Little by little, though, I'm figuring it out.

I'd hoped to hit the half way point on this story by the end of the month.  Doesn't look like it's going to happen but hopefully I can reach the 20,000 word mark by next Monday.

Off to prepare Chapter 2 for my critique meeting this week. It's ugly. Lots of sentences starting with he/she. Body parts contorting in impossible ways. Use of  the word "stalk" at least 6 times.

What's Keeping them Apart?

Completed another 1,000+ words yesterday.

I felt better today about the scene sequence. I had too much external plot overwhelming the characters so took out a scene and expanded a couple of others with dialog - and an almost kiss that hero pulled back from. I need to work on the hero's motivation. There are all kinds of reasons for the hero to go for a relationship with the heroine, external factors have kept them apart, but I need an internal conflict to keep him in check for a few chapters.

Found my ipod so will have to come up with another excuse to avoid the gym today. And it's already snowing so perhaps the roads will be too bad? One can only hope. But it's kind of warm and the snow is melting as it hits the ground so it doesn't look good.